Father’s Day Part 2

Here I am a year later from my last Father’s Day post, wondering how on earth this generation seems to have completely forgotten the lessons from its Fathers, and especially in this country of Canada. Time flies when you are having fun. Canada remains in the grip of Covid psychosis even as the rest of the world has moved on. I know exactly how my Father would have reacted to this culture of fear, and I know I am the same in this respect. Maybe the seed truly does not fall far from the tree.

My Father would have been 100 years old a month ago. He died almost 50 years ago, just as I was coming to consciousness as an adult. Children hold on to false narratives and misperceptions, often driven by the other parent. But also simply a result of a mind not yet versed in enough wisdom as an adult to see things for what they are.

I still remember the time just before my Father died, as I was beginning to see him for who he was, foibles and all. A human like the rest of us. Neither good nor bad but perhaps a mixture of both as we all are. I had worked through the false narratives and I was lucky to be seeing him on a regular basis in those last months.

Some people carry their infantile misperceptions through their adulthood, and I pity them. Others are lucky enough to break though and have the sense to see their parents as the fallible humans and vulnerable sentient beings that we ourselves become. I was lucky, and to spend some time with him before he departed suddenly was a beautiful blessing. My only regrets are the questions I did not ask, the stories I did not hear and the thanks I did not give.

I now have lived much longer than he did - why do I deserve this unscheduled overtime? He fought in a war, submitted to the rigours of post war conformity and tried his best. I have been the beneficiary of his sacrifice.

To those who think that life is endless, I have a message.

Ask him the questions you need to ask, listen to his stories, give him the respect that is deserved, see him for the flawed human that you yourself are, hope that he lives long enough to impart his hard earned wisdom to you, take time to get over your own petty issues and have a glimpse at the big picture before it is your time to climb Jacob’s ladder.

Cherish the time you had with your Father, cherish the time that you HAVE with your Father.

All things must pass.